Star Wars ep 7 The force awakens. How it should have happened.

Star Wars ep 7 The force awakens. How it should have happened.

star wars the force awakens rewrite
Star Wars ep 7 The Force Awakens how it should have happened.

I’m not a Star Wars fan boy who attends conventions and dresses up like a Jedi….BUT…my son’s name is Luke and my German Shepherd’s name is Leia.

We were there on opening day of Star Wars episode 4, A New Hope. That was so awesome to be part of film making history. When I saw Luke standing over the desert with John Williams’ string section, as the two suns began to set, I knew, as a 5-year-old, that I would be creating art in photography and video for the rest of my life…and I was right. We were the first Star Wars fans, when story was king.

It goes without saying I was not a fan of ep 1-3. ep 1 was a train wreck. I almost walked out of the theater. Disaster of stupidity. I’m not sure what I hated more, jar jar’s BS or the boring CNN conference of the Jedi council. LET’S GET ON WITH IT ALREADY!

I digress.

Star Wars episode 7 was a fail to many, being a watered-down version of episode 4. Same cantina scene, same blowing up the death star scene. Boring boring. Stormtroopers looked different, which was also a stupid move. There was nothing to ground to the other films: too many changes. No story on how the New Order came into being. Who is this snoke guy and where has he been for 40 years?

star wars the force awakens stormtrooper
Why did stormtrooper costumes have to change?

Here is how I would have written the story for Star Wars episode 7:

  1. There is no Fin. He’s not necessary and takes up space. He’s fluff. No it’s not because he’s black. Give me a break. Black, white, red, Fin was boring and just seemed to tag along.
  2. Make the movie beginning as is, but when the disgruntled stormtrooper takes off the helmet, it’s Rey! What better place to hide her than right under the New Order’s nose. She was a stormtrooper and decided to defect. She learns of Poe being captured and saves him. They fly off together, escaping in the tie fighter, as in the film, still crashing into the sand.
  3. Rey takes off her stormtrooper costume and finds her way to the AT AT on the ground (like the original film.) She lays down to sleep within the security of AT AT armor and wakes to find the village in the distance. It is there she finds BB8 and is attacked, as she was in the original film. She takes the millennium falcon, and pilots it, as she does, with only BB8 aboard. The rest of the story can be as is.
  4. There would be no star killer base at all. It’s been done. It’s been destroyed. It’s the same thing over and over again. Predictable and boring.
  5. How is it Kylo Ren can stop a laser blast with a thought but can’t kill Fin at the end with a single force choke? What’s going on with that? Either it’s a failed attempt of Disney to create tension and action by prolonging the scene or Kylo Ren was just weak from Chewy’s laser blast. I don’t know, I think it was lame.

They could have done so much more with this film. I would have also kept the stormtrooper costumes the same. I get it. Times change.

HERE’S HOW IT SHOULD HAVE HAPPENED. ADD THE JOKER

Unless Fin has some huge role in this franchise, something of mass importance, they should have left him out. His lines of “Jaku, why does everyone want to go to Jaku?”, and the failed comical banter between him and Han Solo, was too weak and went nowhere. Not to mention they all end up in a cantina with Fin looking for pilots. Sounds familiar.

Those are my thoughts. The film would have been cleaner and made more sense. Maybe I’m wrong, who knows. Let’s make a climactic ending but without a death star or giant sphere of doom to destroy. What do you think?

To be honest, I’m not looking forward to the rest of the films. I wasn’t looking forward to The Farce Awakens, or the Feminist awakens. It’s just not Star Wars anymore to me.

Rogue One, on the other hand. That felt like Star Wars.

Steve

www.steverotter.com