What is depression? Doing what you love can help.

What is depression? Doing what you love can help.

A mental health disorder characterized by persistently depressed mood or loss of interest in activities, causing significant impairment in daily life.

I’m no psychologist, although I wanted to be one years ago. I’ve always been the one listening and helping others. I’m good at it. I think things through and have backup plans for my plan. Most people, I find, don’t think this way. I don’t believe in “I CAN’T.” I’m very driven and usually get what I want by finding ways to make it happen. If I don’t help ME, no one else will.

BUT….sometimes….it doesn’t work that way. Obstacles get in your way. Obstacles you can’t change. Obstacles like yearly taxes you pay on your home that go up every year because these idiots can’t control their spending and put it on the people. Utility bills going up when your income does not. Then surprises like your car’s brakes going out, greeting you with a $600 bill.

money stress depression
Not having enough money for bills is very stressing and can cause depression fast.

These things, and many more, will cause stress and depression, FAST. You may think you’re the only one but you’re not. It’s upsetting at times to see people coming back from vacation. Thoughts of vacation are so out of reach for me when living check to check. We haven’t been on a vacation in 15 years. To be honest, I don’t care much anymore. Most people spend vacations running to see the sights. They need a vacation from their vacation. I’m happy to stay home. I only think about it for my young kids.

I digress. Money is the largest cause of stress and depression.

I know people with a lot of money. They go on vacations a lot with their family. They have big houses. One has their own vineyard in Europe. Visiting one of their local homes was amazing. They showed us the theater room, complete with leather recliners, the workout room, the beautifully – landscaped backyard and the enormous kitchen. A crew of chefs was hired to prepare the meal, in their kitchen, for the party.  I left that party depressed. I got more depressed to find utility bills I am not going to be able to afford, in the mail. It’s a daily effort to not think about it. You may second guess yourself and what you’re doing wrong. Why is it you, always getting table scraps, if any?!

Don’t get caught up in “everyone’s life is better than mine.” The grass IS always greener. A favorite story of mine is the married couple and the single guy in the mall. I was in the mall one day and noticed a married couple with a baby in a stroller. Walking passed them was a male in his mid 20’s alone. I wondered what they each thought about, if anything, during passing. I wonder if the married man thought, “Ah, to be single again like that guy, and not nagged. How awesome would that be?” I then thought the single guy thought, “look at that guy, probably has a great job and family. He’s got someone to go home to each night.” Interesting isn’t it?

So I ask myself, what is depression? Do I have it? Isn’t depression a disease you’re born with? Maybe if I had money I would be happy. THEY say money won’t make you happy. Well, for me, I would be happy if my bills were paid. One less stress. If my dog got sick or had a problem I could pay the vet without worrying about money.

All I need is survival money with a little extra for surprises or savings. In this day and age that isn’t happening for many.

We live within our means. We don’t go out much. Stuff is too expensive and we’re on one income. My wife reminds me of the nice family we have. She’s right. I still worry. I get upset about not having money to take my kids somewhere like a museum or even the zoo. I’m too busy worrying about where money for groceries is coming from.

This babble is leading to something. If you’re worried about money you’re not alone.

It’s time to find something in life you love to do and do it. If you can make money doing it, all the better! No matter how silly or stupid you think it is, if you enjoy, do it.

If you want to start writing for others to read, like this, then do it. If you want to collect puzzles, do it. If you want to play the flute, even though it’s not as cool as guitar, then YOU DO IT! 🙂 People overthink this too much. They question whether or not they should do things that make them happy because it isn’t the “thing to do.” It isn’t the thing that’s “a CAREER.” It isn’t the thing others would approve of. My dad said a long time ago, “if you want to be a garbage man, be the best garbage man you can be.”

One of my very close friends said the other week that she admires me because I’m not afraid to take chances. That was such a huge compliment. She said I’m never afraid to do what I want to do. There’s nothing to be afraid of, I just do it until I don’t enjoy it anymore.

Huge depression can come in other areas. In a relationship, It’s unfortunate if you’re with someone who doesn’t feel the same way about you as you do them. Money will not fix that. If money does fix that, you’re with an idiot and you’re an idiot for being with them. That’s a trap and hard to get out of, if you’re married, but it can be done.

I thought for years that I needed “a real career.” I needed to go to college for something big, you know, with a title. That was stupid. Money is money and how you make it is what counts. There is no such thing as job security. I have lost 3 jobs due to hostile take overs from other companies. Employed on day, not the next. Don’t be afraid to make money doing what you love to do, even if it’s on the side to supplement your income. I will be writing about extra ways I make money in future blogs.

I’m seeing that more and more people make money doing what they love as the years go by. Did you know, there are little kids, making 6 FIGURES on You Tube by having their parents film them playing with toys?! My sons watch those channels! 6 FIGURES! That’s more than what most attorneys make! If it pays the bills, who cares.

I never cared to climb the corporate ladder. At the end of it all, it’s long hours and BS backstabbing and then you die. No man has ever said, while on their death bed, “I wish I would have spent more time at the office.”

What helps get me through is doing what makes me happy.

Someone once said I need to get out more. I don’t have the money for that. The person who said this had no hobbies by the way. I felt bad for her, spending money to have to go out and have a good time. I also don’t have the time for that because I’m too busy doing what I love and what I want to do. To be honest, people in public places annoy me with their inconsiderate ways. I enjoy spending time in my basement, in my studio, creating and editing film productions and working on you tube projects. We do little things as a family and are ok with that. I’ve been into film since I was a kid. 35 years later and I’m still going strong. Do what you love and the rest will fall into place. This works best if you have passions and revisit them again. Simply trying things to see what you enjoy will work as well, but may also remind you that you’re simply trying things to get away from the issue.

Don’t be embarrassed by depression and don’t delay in talking with someone about it. Did you know your regular doctor can prescribe general antidepressants? One popular one is called Ecitalopram. As with any drug, it is important to speak with your doctor to find the right medication that is for you. Don’t be afraid to talk with a psychologist or psychiatrist or counselor. Remember, again, they are just human and they’re not even perfect. If you feel odd or uncomfortable with the person you are speaking to, follow your gut and find someone else.

Counselors are professionals who can listen and help. Stress is really bad mentally and physically. Get it checked out.

By the way, that couple with the really nice house with that huge party……

They got divorced a year later.

If you liked reading this, consider subscribing to my blog to get alerted for new posts. See the link at the very bottom of the page.

Thanks for reading!

Steve

http://www.steverotter.com

 

DEPRESSION:

Possible causes include a combination of biological, psychological, and social sources of distress. Increasingly, research suggests these factors may cause changes in brain function, including altered activity of certain neural circuits in the brain.

The persistent feeling of sadness or loss of interest that characterizes major depression can lead to a range of behavioral and physical symptoms. These may include changes in sleep, appetite, energy level, concentration, daily behavior, or self-esteem. Depression can also be associated with thoughts of suicide.

The mainstay of treatment is usually medication, talk therapy, or a combination of the two. Increasingly, research suggests these treatments may normalize brain changes associated with depression.

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